Adoption and facebook etiquette

From Feministe blog come this post about an adoptive parent's response to seeing her daughter's photo on the first mother's Facebook page.

Eve and her two mothers.

Jay writes,

No one taught me Facebook etiquette when I was growing up, and no one
taught me how to build a relationship with my daughter’s birthmother.
One of these things is more important than the other, but both require
common sense, clarity of purpose and generosity of soul. Here’s hoping
I can find all three when I need them.