The photo above sums it all up for me. Balancing precariously all the different aspects of my life and hoping it doesn't all topple down!
Today is the first day in a new phase of my life. I leave early tomorrow for a family vacation and when I return on Labor Day, I begin life as a Ph.D. student at the School of Social Work researching adoption and child welfare. I am excited and nervous about managing all this work ahead of me and trying to be present for my kids and Mr. HM and my friends and loved ones too. It's a long -haul project here. By the time the ink on my dissertation is dry, one of my kids will be in college and the other one in high school. I may have many gray hairs when all is said and done.
This is the unexpected and unforeseen culmination of my many passions and interests over the past twenty years, something I only dared to dream of a few years ago. Despite being a venture taken squarely in mid-life, I know I would not have been ready to tackle it until now. Until things in my personal life had settled enough to give me the breathing room to move ahead. I had lots of things to figure out, and blogging at Harlow's Monkey for the past 2 1/2 years has been an important part of that growth. I have worked out a lot of thoughts here in this blog, tested some theories and concepts and met a lot of amazing people in real life, just because of being present in the blog'o'sphere.
However, because of this new phase in my life, I am going to have to bid all my readers a fond farewell – at least for now, and for a long time to come. I just can not keep up with the demands of blogging as I have. While I have enjoyed my time in the sun, it's just time to move on (or else my adoption -related commitment issues are in play here, *wink*). And honestly, it was never my intention for the blog to become a forum for adoptive parents (no offense to all the great adoptive parents I've met along the way). I've been chided for not being more "open" and for being perhaps too hard or single-minded in my expressed opinions about the adoption experience. I'm tired of all that. I wanted to blog — about my experiences as a transracial and transnational adoptee, my take on the adoption profession, my views about how society views adoption. It was not my intention to create a place for debate or even dialog, really – this endeavor was just to present a pov that most adoptive parents and adoption professionals didn't really know or understand.
Harlow's Monkey became more than my blog, it became my persona and took over my life. Many great things have happened as a direct result of this blog. Thank you to everyone who took the time to give me feedback on how the blog has impacted your lives. Thanks especially to all the adoptees…honestly, you're the reason I kept going this long.
This website will remain as a resource for anyone who stumbles across it, and for those who want to take a walk down memory lane. I hope there is sufficient information here that will continue to be applicable for adoptees and adoptive parents and professionals alike. In a few weeks I will be closing comments on the blog, but if you want to contact me regarding some of the content on the blog (or for re-print permission) feel free to e-mail me.
There are so many posts in my draft box I never finished. I have lots more to say, just not the time to say it. Not for a while anyway…we'll see how it goes…I'm closing the book club too. Sadly, I don't think I'll have time to read any fiction for a very long time. However, I'll still be around at Anti-Racist Parent and Kimchi Mamas when I can. Who knows? In the future there may be a post or two about my adventures
being an adoptee researching and studying adoption research and
navigating that tricky terrain.
Thanks for being faithful readers, and for all you adoptees out there . . . well, you'll likely see me again out there somewhere. Those of you who know the places I frequent will probably find me in the blog'o'sphere doing my thing. Give me a wave.